I%26#039;m considering changing my first name, as all my life I%26#039;ve never felt comfortable with it. My father went behind my mums back after my birth while she was in the hospital, and filed my birth certificate without her because they couldn%26#039;t agree on a name. The name he gave me has never felt like it was mine, and I%26#039;ve never liked it. Mum died a decade ago, so her reaction isn%26#039;t an issue, but my father will be absolutely heartbroken. If I were to change it, it wouldn%26#039;t be to anything too different from my own, and my family would still be able to call me what they wished, but legally, and to anyone new I met, I would use my new, preferred name. How do I bring this topic up with my father in a way that he won%26#039;t feel guilty?|||Well, I would sit him down in the living room and tell him you have to talk to him, which should get his attention. Then I would start off with, %26quot;Remember when...%26quot; or something like that, and repeat the story, which he should recognize anyway. When you%26#039;re finished, I would say, %26quot;Well, since Mom died...%26quot; and tell him your decision. Discuss it openly, make sure neither of you makes accusations and you both stay calm. If you can%26#039;t, I would leave and bring it up another time and do the same thing until you can both listen and talk to each other.
I would listen to his opinion, but know that my decision was already made and be open minded but stand my ground. Then, I would just do it. Like a band-aid, just rip it off. It might sting for a while, but if you know in your heart that it will be worth it, just do it.
