She avoids the topic of marriage?

well, my gf and i have been dating for awhile now and i was thinking of asking her to marry me, but every time i get up the nerve to even bring up the topic in conversation to maybe test the waters, she goes into this other mode where all she wants to do is change the topic. one day i actually had gotten up the courage to ask her flat out how she felt about marriage and all she said was that it made her jittery, and that i shouldnt worry about it right now. if i ever do ask, i definitely wont until after her birthday, which is in november. by then we will have been dating for nearly a year. and yes, i know some people think that's way too early, but i really love her with all my heart. my parents were engaged on their second date and they have been together for 40 years!



anyways, am i being too pushy with the subject or is she being dodgy with me?

i really dont want to spend another day not married to her. she's amazing...but i dont want to push her. im just worried that there might be underlying causes to her being so scared.



help? [[sorry about the length, by the way]]
She avoids the topic of marriage?
I started dating my husband in January of 1999 and we were engaged in December of 1999. We have been married since 2001. So a year is not to short of a time limit. Just don't propose on any type of holiday or birthday. All you can do is ask and hope that she will say yes.
She avoids the topic of marriage?
am i being too pushy with the subject; YES

or is she being dodgy with me? YES

There is no set time frame in which to ask someone to marry you, so slow down. Clearly, she is not even close to being ready, so unless you want to push her away, then just chill out and enjoy one another.
the first years is always the easiest. If your can make it through the second year then pop the question!!
Firstly I think one year is not very long to be thinking about this - your parents are a rare exception.

With things the way they are, it sounds like popping the question will be a definite fail at the moment. I would only ask when you are about 90% sure you will get a yes. Even if she likes you a lot so far, she may not even know how to reply if she has not known you for long enough to decide properly.

Finally I would HIGHLY recommend living together for a year or so, or at least a few months, before making any big commitments. I really wish I had.

...how old are you?
A year is really not long to be dating someone enough to know that you really want to spend the rest of your life with. Enjoy the time together, don't push the subject on her, maybe she has some reservations because of past experience with her self or even her parents. Maybe she is not ready for a commitment. After 2 years, sit down with her and tell her that these 2 years have made you still want to be with her and you want to think marriage. The take it from there.



Good Luck

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